Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Enforceable What?

Most children do us the biggest of favors simply by doing what we ask of them.  Love and Logic has reminded me that we really can't make anyone do anything.  The children that happily follow our directions just haven't figured that out, and I'm so glad.  Then there are those who know this little secret.  No one can make them do anything, even their teacher.  Enter Love and Logic's enforceable statements.  They really do work, even with the little ones who have figured out they have free will.  An enforceable statement is simply a statement about what we actually do have control over.  







And so on...

The difference between a command and an enforceable statement is slight in syntax but significant in effectiveness, especially with certain kids.  Since I can't control children, basically I state what I will do, since that's the only thing I truly can control.  

Enforceable statements typically begin with these words:

You're welcome to...
Feel free to...
You may...
I'll be happy to...

Enforceable statements aren't cure-alls, but they can certainly reduce dreaded power struggles.  It might take some practice, but give it a whirl and see what you think.

If you're interested in more Love and Logic posts:


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18 comments:

  1. A great reminder Tammy! I may have to dig out my copy of that book-haven't looked at it in awhile.

    NotJustChild'sPlay

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    1. Miss Trayers, got to love a good Love and Logic book!

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  2. Great post Tammy! We all need a reminder once in a while not to get into those power struggles with students. :) Thanks for that!
    Lori
    Conversations in Literacy

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    1. Lori, some kids seem to enjoy a good power struggle for sure. (Thanks for the pins!)

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  3. I really like this! I do this sometimes but have to really remember to do it more. I usualy say it like I will take a quiet line to ___. Thanks for the excellent post!
    Gina
    Third Grade Tidbits

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    1. Gina, it took me some practice to make it part of how I just talk about most everything. Thanks for the comment!

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  4. Thank you so much! I'm having a head scratching time with one of my owlets. I'm going to try using these kind of statements.
    Jenny
    Owl Things First

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    1. Jenny, I understand the head-scratching moments! I hope this helps.

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  5. Thank you so much for this post! I had never heard of this before, but I have a very challenging class this year. They are all special needs children, but I'm going to try this out with them. Thank you!!!

    Carolyn
    Exceptional Kinders

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    1. Carolyn, you should look into Love and Logic resources at your local library. They're very helpful.

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    1. Kelli, thank you! I hope it's useful for you.

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  7. This was a great reminder, I am going to jot them in my notebook before I teach by my easel for reminders! Melissa

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    1. Thanks Melissa. I hope this becomes something very useful.

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  8. Love this! Our behavior team has been looking for some positive strategies..and these are perfect ways to encourage positive behavior! We will be sharing this with our staff!

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    1. You should definitely look up Love and Logic. I think you would enjoy it.

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